Got a text from Powers this morning that he woke up with a rock solid Linden-wood after dreaming about the play we have cooked up this weekend. I personally woke up and my piss burned so that's no good but I'll take care of that over the summer or something. Stay tuned for #PowerTan's first three legger of the season, it's a good one. I don't feel like copying and pasting the bullshit explanation paragraph of what #PowerTan is so if you're new here we bet big unit lax, win big, and spend it on booze pussy and drugs.
Season Totals
Record: 13-12
Risk: $3,275.00
Winnings: $3,851.91
Net Gain/Loss: +$576.91
Quick recap of last weekend: Army missed an empty net to push. That fucken sucked but we still love Army. While that was going on, I was shithammered in the stands of Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium watching the Midshipmen's sweet comeback and proceeded to get completely mangled on the water in Annapolis after. I love America and our military.
Another week of no shortlist, mainly because most of the spreads are either gigantic or +-1.5 and that shits gay. Need to see some more handicapping interns on lax again, those Vegas toolbags need to stop acting like they care about lax and let the big dogs eat.
#PowerPlay of Week 9:
Denver -8.5 vs. St. John's. -115
Wager: $50 to pay: $93.47
#TanPlay of Week 9:
Detroit Mercy -2.5 @ Lindenwood. -120
Wager: $50 to pay: $91.66
(Note: Our solo plays are plays that we actually make, but do not contribute to the overall #PowerTan record.)
Alright gents, here we go. First three legger in #PowerTan history. 🔨
Quinnipiac ML @ Siena
Detroit Mercy -2.5 @ Lindenwood
Notre Dame ML @ Duke
+290
Wager: $76 to pay: $296.57
This parlay fucken fires me up. Let's start with Qunnipiac. This one's pretty damn obvious if you look at Siena's record this year, and also if you remember that Quinnipiac fucks. The spread here is Qpac -3 and I really like that too, depending how my night at the casino tonight goes I might hit that on the side for fun. Siena is actually so washed and they're lucky The Mount is in their conference or else they'd be boned. The Donnerys sent me a snapchat this week doing blow off a lax whore's tits and I screenshotted it in case that bitch ever tries to call rape. That shit was consensual and I can prove it.
As for Lindenwood, 🫵😂. They're so awful and I almost feel bad for them except I like making money so fuck that. Powers and I were the only two people watching the Lindenwood v. Queens game earlier this season (I checked the ratings) and it was actually like watching a high school jv game in Illinois. Queens beat Lindenwood 8-3 (someone score a fucken goal holy shit) and Detroit Mercy is coming into this one fresh off beating Queens 12-7. That's why this line makes no fucken sense to me. Queens' only wins this season are Lwood and beating Hampton 14-7, how fucken sorry is that 😂. Imagine getting scored on 7 times by Hampton. Anyways, Lindenwood's last roar is gonna result in 0 wins and Detroit Mercy can score goals so this leg is a total 🏧.
Now for the fun one. Notre Dame v. Duke being on Sunday is gonna make for a great ending to this parlay. I'm so excited to wake up cripplingly hung on Sunday, grab the bong and plant myself in the couch for the day until it's ND time. Duke needs a statement win bad but Notre Dame is not gonna be it. The Kavanaughs are way too republican to lose to O'Meal on the day of the Lord, kinda messed up they're making those patriots play on a Sunday to begin with. America has no respect for religion anymore, it's fucken bullshit. Hope you all have a fantastic and booze-filled weekend and let's make some cash. 🆓🍺🔜
Week 0
High Point -5, Navy -6. +230
Wager: $50 to pay: $165
✅
Johns Hopkins -6.5, Boston University ML. +193
Wager: $66.63 to pay: $202.03
✅
Week 1
Johns Hopkins ML, Rutgers -5.5. +209
Wager: $50 to pay: $154.88
❌
Hofstra -6. -120
Wager: $50 to pay: $91.67
❌
UMBC -1.5. +105
Wager: $100 to pay: $205
❌
Week 2
Le Moyne -2.5, Navy -1.5. +224
Wager: $50 to pay: $162
❌
Notre Dame -9.5. -115
Wager: $50 to pay: $93.47
✅
Monmouth +11.5. +100
Wager: $50 to pay: $100
✅
Boston U -2.5, Bryant +3.5. +234
Wager: $100 to pay: $334.38
✅
Week 3
Albany -1.5. +120
Wager: $400 to pay: $880
❌
Lehigh -2.5. -132
Wager: $132 to pay: $232
✅
St. John’s -4. -120
Wager: $200 to pay: $366.66
❌
Army +3.5, Siena ML. +197
Wager: $100 to pay: $297.90
✅
Week 4
Cornell -2. -110
Wager: $110 to pay: $210
✅
Army -7. -115
Wager: $115 to pay: $215
❌
HPU +5, Stony Brook ML. +185
Wager: $50 to pay: $142.50
❌
Fairfield +5. -115
Wager: $115 to pay: $215
❌
Week 5
Quinnipiac -3, Notre Dame ML. +107
Wager: $150.37 to pay: $312.36
✅
Manhattan ML, Denver ML. +140
Wager: $100 to pay: $240.62
❌
High Point -18.5, Canisius ML. +242
Wager: $200 to pay: $685.50
❌
Week 6
Towson -4, Denver ML. +236
Wager: $108 to pay: $363.44
✅
Week 7
Quinnipiac -1.5. +105
Wager: $300 to pay: $615
✅
VMI ML. -120
Wager: $178 to pay: $326.33
✅
Week 8
Army -2 @ UNC. -115
Wager: $215 to pay: $467.39
❌
Week 9
Quinnipiac ML, Detroit Mercy -2.5, Notre Dame ML. +290
Wager: $76 to pay: $296.57
⏳