Ford's Take on D3 Selection Sunday

It’s been a great weekend of pawgs, crystal meth, and tax evasion, but now it’s time to dial the fuck in because the D3 tournament was announced Sunday.  Some people might have a problem with what the selection, but I think it’s about damn time the rest of D3 gives the ‘Cac the respect it deserves. The Nescac was made great again.  Trinity, Bowdoin, Midd, Tufts, Wesleyan, Amherst, and even Williams got a bid to the show.  Historically, they only took 4, but now I think they’ve realized that any other team on this list that isn’t Salisbury, RPI, or RIT would probably have a hard time even against fucking Colby which didn’t win a single game in the Nescac.  

People might say Trinity doesn’t belong because they didn’t make the Nescac tournament, but that was a mistake on the Nescac committee.  Clearly, those making the nescac tournament have never touched bag in their life, and don’t know ball.

  I personally took some members of the NCAA selection committee with me to a kegger in Hartford, so I could get them to reevaluate what these guys bring to the table  When we got to the lax house, it took about 30 minutes for them to realize that the Bant’s are something special, when they saw a 10:1 PAWG ratio and more powder than Jackson Hole Wyoming on the coffee table.  

Tufts won the Nescac tournament, which isn't surprising at all.  They’re gay but they’ve been really good, they are really good, they’ll still be good years from now.  Coach Casey D’annolfo is a total enigma though, his rope is almost as big as he is, he was a total powerdrill in college, and he was the only 3 sport athlete at Tufts who actually got burn back in his day.  But once he graduated, he turned into an absolute pussy, arguing in the comments of twitter with burner accounts and opinions like his were why the ‘Cac sucked donkey dick for the past few years.  If he goes back to being the guy that Tuft’s freshman girls weren’t allowed to hook up with, then the ‘Bo’s would do more than win the natty, they’d no longer be #LGBTufts.  

Wesleyan beating Bowdoin wasn’t totally unexpected, Raba is a great coach and the dirty birds were able to make some good adjustments.  They were hungry and had great potential.  Last game they played, it was even 6v6, but Wesleyan kept losing the ball in transition, and ended up getting fucked in the riding and clearing game.  But after John Raba consulted Coach Mathers and told the dirty birds did 100 reps of wall ball for every gram of coke they consumed in the fall, they cleaned up their stickwork and were able to show what makes them so special.  Unfortunately Tufts absolutely gaped them for the nescac championship, but what matters is that they still have a bid to the show.

As far as picks go, I see Amherst beating Endicott, and Bowdoin beating them after.  I don’t think the polar bears will make the same mistakes they did against Amherst, and if they can keep Bob Gross from contributing, there's a big chance they will have this in the bag.  He’s the kind of player where if he balls out, then the whole team is eating.  Ohio Wesleyan and SJF should be a grit show, but RIT is going to be waiting for them.  SJF might end up pulling of a crazy upset like they did against Wesleyan last year though, so be on the lookout for that. 

St. Lawrence and Midd is a toss up, but either way, they’re not making it past Tufts.  The same goes for Dickinson and Denison, both of them aren’t upsetting Salisbury.  I’d be quick to dismiss Williams against RPI, but honestly, they had some sus losses to Saint Lawrence, which lost to Skidmore.  Skidmore fucking blows.

My picks for the elite 8 are going to be Bowdoin vs CNU, Trinity vs RIT, Wesleyan vs Salisbiry and Tufts vs W&L.  

Cheers,

Ford