top of page

Conference Tournament Previews: Tan's Favorites

Ladies and Conservatives it's that time of the year. Conference play begins across D1 this weekend and I wanted to quickly break down how I think my favorite conferences to watch will play out this year.

BIG 10


  1. Hopkins

  2. Maryland

  3. Penn State

  4. Michigan

  5. Rutgers

  6. Ohio State


QF 1: Michigan v. Rutgers, Rutgers W

QF 2: Penn State v. Ohio State, Penn State W

SF 1: Hopkins v. Rutgers, Hopkins W

SF 2: Maryland v. Penn State, Penn State W

Championship: Hopkins v. Penn State

Champion: Penn State

I think Hop and Maryland do well in conference play and get the top seeds. Penn State may struggle to get going. Michigan are fucken frauds. I hope Rutgers finishes above them but they should knock them out in QF 1 whether they're the 4 or the 5. Unfortunately, I don't see Maryland being the real deal this year so they lose to Penn State. Hopkins will take care of Rutgers (or Michigan but hopefully not, fuck them) in the SF, but Penn State is way too gritty to lose to Hopkins. Hopkins' pretty boy Russell Melendez will get fucken seatbelted by Penn State's defense and their true superstar Degnon will have a day but it won't be enough. Penn State will be poised to make a tournament run and hopefully won't be eliminated by another bullshit missed call. People forget they should have been playing in the natty last year.



  1. Notre Dame

  2. Duke

  3. Virginia

  4. Cuse

  5. UNC


SF 1: Notre Dame v. Cuse, Notre Dame W

SF 2: Duke v. Virginia, Duke W

Championship: Notre Dame v. Duke

Champion: Notre Dame

I think someone with 0 lacrosse knowledge could have written the same prediction but the ACC is so hard to call this year. UNC is unfortunately still not ready to compete with the big dogs so they're out of the picture. Cuse is having a year so far but I really don't think they can get to the ACC championship, yes they beat Hopkins but the other 3 teams are such juggernauts. At least 3 of the 4 that make the ACC tournament will get at-large bids to the dance but I have no fucken clue whether Cuse or UVA misses out. Have to go with Cuse. UVA is electric but Shelly and Big Country will have a hell of a time trying to take down Duke or ND. UVA conceded 15 goals to Towson (who are a good team) but ND, Duke, and Cuse will all score 20+ on them if they play like that against any of those squads so I have them losing to Duke. It's Brennan O'Neill's senior year and that mf is feinding for a natty like a D3 kid fiending his buddy's elf bar on a Saturday night. Just don't think they'll be able to take down ND for the ACC championship. The Kavanaughs will be fired up with all of the election shit going on and they love Trump so they'll be locked the fuck in #YoungGOPVoters.



  1. Delaware

  2. Towson

  3. Drexel

  4. Stony Brook

  5. Fairfield

  6. Hofstra

  7. Monmouth

Relegated to D2: Hampton


SF 1: Delaware v. Stony Brook, Delaware W

SF 2: Towson v. Drexel, Towson W

Championship: Delaware v. Towson

Champion: Towson

I've probably watched more CAA lacrosse this season than anyone else in the United States of America #NiceFloTVSubscriptionTan and I think Delaware are a bunch of fucken frauds (they're gonna get molested by Cuse this weekend btw). They're the pretty boys of this conference and expect to walk through this tournament with ease like the last two years but that's not happening again. They've been ranked all year blah blah blah don't care. This is the year they fold and the Tigers get back to the dance. Whoever the 3 seed is will put up a good fight against them, and Drexel has the best chance, but Towson has been fucken buzzing. Their offense continues to put up huge numbers against big time teams (already mentioned they scored 15 on UVA) and with names like Demaio, Villagomez, Weisshaar and Gallagher they'll be fucken rolling come tournament time. They'll play Delaware in the championship, Delaware will underestimate them, and they'll get their shit pushed in #RingTheTigers. As for the rest of the conference, Stony Brook will definitely make the tournament and if they beat Delaware that would be hilarious. Fairfield is meh, Hofstra blow this year #StillMadAboutStJohns, Monmouth is ass and Hampton would lose to the majority of high school varsity programs in the country. I genuinely feel bad for them, they get 20 pieces on their heads every game and I hope they can figure something out moving forward. #FuckDelaware and #GohTigers.

562 views1 comment

Recent Posts

See All

1 Yorum

Epstein won the IVY League again

bottom of page