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Marcille and Hopkins put Cuse in a Mental Blender.

If anyone watched this game, or was lucky enough to be in attendance, a few things stick out. The first is Tim Marcille. The second was Mikey Powell getting his jersey retired. If you witnessed his speech, god bless your soul may you cheef an elf bar in Bud Light paradise. But if you didn't see the clip, I suggest you head over to @ghettogarygait on Instagram to see how fucking down bad horrendous this speech was. But Before I get into more detail about Powell, I wanna start with Tim "my sex tape got leaked on Reddit" Marcille. This guys FUCKS. He went off for 21 saves and let in only 9. It straight up looked like he was playing fucking Rocket League out there. I heard he mixed his Gatorade bottle with 1/3 Pink Whitney, 1/3 Malibu and 1/3 fireball. Russell Melendez told me Timmy didn't fucking go to sleep the night before the game and rather stayed up drinking until 5 am and on Omegle flirting with some 47 year old English Teacher who sent him soapy tit pics and then gave his phone a virus from local-milfs-in-your-area.com. Besides that absolute baller pregame routine, I heard "Big Meat" Marcille's post game routine was 10x better. A local reporter said that within 2 hours of the game ending, Tim fucked Gary Gait's wife, finger banged Pat March's auntie and then got some spicy nudes from Pietramala's niece. Safe to say Tim won't be invited to The Dome ever again.


Now onto the best part of the whole game: Mikey Powell's jersey retirement speech. Boy oh boy this was one for the ages. In case you didn't know, this jersey was "ours". Mike Powell like seriously what the fuck. Like there's no way you sat down, wrote "this jersey is ours" three times and was like, "nah this tuff. Syracuse is gonna fucking love this". Bro. The speech. Was. Fucking. TRASH. I mean like since it was "ours" you all might as well congratulate yourselves for having a jersey retired in The Dome. Shit, even my 11 year old cousin named Benson who shoves earth worms up his ass, rapes possums for fun and has a dick that is the color of 13 different shades of purple had his jersey reitired!?


All in all, this was a huge win for Hopkins and another let down for Cuse. Luckily for the Orange they get a half retarded team in St. Bonaventure coming to town next week where Cuse should analy rape them and then finish it off with a happy ending massage. Congrats to Marcille for being a stallion. As always, cheers to another great weekend of lax my friends.

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