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FTX week 11 top performances

Michael Boehm, Michigan

Boehmer had himself a fucking day against O state Saturday, 8 goals off ten shots to put on a clinic against the rivals. Along with this, he flew out Pehlkes duke track chick and gave her the Boehmer special if you know what I mean. Impressive stuff to say the least. Great job Mike!

Xander Dickson, Virginia

The Malnourished Maestro himself could not be stopped by Syracuse Saturday, 7 goals and 2 assists and he made it look easy. I did not hear of him flying out any Chicks but I did hear he had a long grappling session with freshman Truitt Sunderland after seeing him drinking water. Great work Xander!

Dylan Donnery, Quinnipiac

Always great to see a member of the most prestigious program in America on our list. Dylan "Stiffler" Donnery posted 5 genos and an apple in a big conference win over LIU on senior day. Safe to say it was a bad night to be a beer in Hamden Ct that night. Great work Dylan!

Russel Melendez, John's Hopkins

Despite getting a bad rep from that cringe fella on Twitter named Diggstape, Russel is a goddamn Nailgun. 2 goals and 3 assists to lead the Jays to reclaim their rivalry against Johns Hopkins, one being a backhand to put the jays up two with a min left. I bet he had a fun night on Saturday. Great work Russel!

Reese Burek, Army

The Sigma male had 4 goals and an apple leading Army to an easy dub over their rivals, is that good? Reese with an absolute Masterclass per usual for army to rebound after a loss. Again really not sure if these guys are allowed to celebrate like that but I'd guess they shot some Ar 15s or packed some fat lips. Great work Reese!

I did see Coulter Mackesey and Cj Kirst had impressive performances, however doesn't count because I don't think either of them could even smell a 10. Cheers!

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