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UVA Breakdown. My current favorite by a landslide.

First off, look at this guy right here. Heart of a warrior, the mind of a champion, and my pick to be New England's next slot receiver. Guy defines the word grit.

Usually, this blog likes to poke fun and joke around a bit without getting into all the nerd stuff. Don't want to get into all the statistics, let's just say it how it is. I was told "Greg, stick to the Inside Lax script and type up the same article for the 100th time," -Undisclosed source, (Ty Xanders you unimaginative piece of shit).

Long story short, we don't do that here.

This team is fast, when they get hot there is nothing slowing them down. With Lasalla being as good as he is, this offense will continue to produce at a very high level. At attack, Shiesty Shellenberger is the best player in the country hands down. I've heard rumors that he refuses to go out to parties and instead, practices his patented split dodge behind his apartment on weekend nights. His passing is unreal it's like watching myself again. Next up is Payton 'Big Country' Cormier. Elite finisher and sneaky fast for someone who needs to watch his weight. Xander Dickson is a good number 2 for Shellenberger, their chemistry has gone to a different level this season.

At the midfield, Mcconvey out of the box is my favorite weapon on this team. When this guy shoots, my wife Margaret tears up. It's like watching a heterosexual version of Paul Rabil out there. Outside of him, the list of options goes on forever. Miezan will only get better, and Schutz, Conner, and Sunderland are all good enough to be on M line 1. So yeah, options and more options.

On defense, I'm a little worried still, Sausage Saustad and Silky Sallade are beasts, but, their other poles... not so much. They will improve and with my preseason player of the year, Evan Wintergreen Zinn, it is not the worst situation in the world.

Nunes is the biggest weirdo ever, or so I've heard, but he is a top 3 goalie in the country. Abstinence runs strong with this one, he just wants to win, gotta love it.

In all, this team is ready to get back to Championship Weekend. Bunch of Rhino Pill taking tiger sharks out there. Love to see it gentlemen.



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